Living With It

Closing this Blog for my Main BLOG

2012-01-02T16:29:00.000-06:00

I have a blog at http://www.bethannestrasser.blogspot.com. It's called Romance in Writing, though at this point, I've considered changing that as well.

I'm consolidating.

Please, please, please follow me over on Romance in Writing. I will still be talking about my diabetes and life in general. I'll touch on anything that meets my fancy: writing, cooking, Army life, diabetes, kids, family, etc.

Thanks for staying with me this long and I hope to see you over there!
Take care,
With Love,
Bethanne

The Older I get....

2012-01-02T11:47:00.002-06:00

The less I feel like anyone wants to listen to me.

I have hit a wall in my search for a doctor who will acknowledge that I know just as much if not MORE than he does. This latest doctor is the worst! Not only is he the worst, he loves himself WAY TOO MUCH. He says that he is working with Minimed, consulting with them to change things, but the changes he suggests do NOT coincide with how I manage my diabetes. As a matter of fact, it leaves everything to the doctor [which is good for the doctor with the God complex]. It eliminates the use of 95% of the data I get from my CGM and pump. He wants premeal BGs and a bedtime one, if I feel like it.

WHAT THE YOU-KNOW-WHAT?!

Isn't that taking a step BACK in diabetes management?

"Uh, yes ma'am, is sure as hell is." <--that's me, talking to myself.

See, there's this AVERAGE in diabetes that is a statement of about how much basal insulin a typical diabetic will use. The rates, starting at midnight, rise at predawn then slowly through the day decrease. Sooo, maybe I'm not that typical, but Dr. God, on seeing my rates, shook his head and said, "This is a mess."

He then proceeded to suggest changes that replicate what an average, healthy diabetic's basal rates should be.

But, after seven years on the pump and three kids later, I can tell you, without a doubt, that my basal rates do not follow that trend. WHAT?! how is that possible?! But, again, as with my last doctor, I wanted to give him the benefit of the doubt. [or perhaps I just wanted to prove him wrong] But I changed my rates to his suggestions and watched my sugars go way up and stay there for three days, with just an occasional drop because of corrections.

Now, let me set you straight. Perhaps you want to believe I'm just too obstinate or rebellious or bad. It's true I've changed doctors a good bit, but at this point, it has never been because I disagreed with a doctor. I just move around a lot. My husband is in the Army so that plays a huge roll, too.

This is the first time in 23 years, I am about to cancel an appointment with a doctor because I hate him.
Part of me wants to write him a letter to make sure he knows that he is NOT helping the diabetic community. That his methods, even if they work for him or most of his patients, are not giving anyone the tools to manage their own diabetes.

Or I could just quietly leave.
What would you do?

EgoCentral

2011-12-10T16:39:00.001-06:00

That's what I call my new doctor's office. OMG. I've never met anyone so confident and liking of himself. :P I haven't decided I'm keen on it. I'm not at all impressed by his expectations... on the other hand, he doesn't really know me yet, so perhaps he just needs some time to acknowledge my goals.

We shall see.
My A1c was 6.4, a far cry from the 5.7 I was in May. I'm not too happy about that even though the doctor seems to think it's good. He doesn't "use" the sensor as a regular part of the diabetes regimen. That worries me a little, especially since I do use one and I LIKE IT!

Christmas is almost on us, and I am enjoying the season.
BEST CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS EVER????

LIGHTS, inside! I love the tree shining in my front window. And this year, I've got them drapped on the fireplace mantel, too. It's looks soooo nice.

Take care!
~Bethanne

Dulldrum Diabetes

2011-10-26T14:27:00.000-05:00

I started getting bored recently. It happens. We do the same things everyday. We test our sugar. We download our CGM results. We go to the doctor. We eat. It gets boring. So I started putzing around online to see what was new on the market. Any new pumps or devices that would spice up my dulldrum diabetes life?

And I found a few things.

Animas and Dexcom are still claiming a combined device... really?! After all these years. People just keep hanging on that story and waving and cheering every time it pops back up on the webosphere. It's exciting, or it was three years ago. But seriously... if Minimed can do it, how come they can't? If it's a device that, in theory, has already been approved by the FDA for Minimed, how come it's taking so long to be approved? Is it that different?

And then I found The Enlite. The newest sensor technology from Minimed. I'm drooling. I'm excited.

....I wish I lived in the UK or Australia. :(

The Enlite looks smaller than the Dexcom. It goes in at a 90 degree angle and it's only 9mm. It has an auto shut off for hypoglycemia. And it'll be paired with the newest model of the pump... no word on any specifics there, but hopefully, if anything, the darn thing has louder beeps. That's the only downside of the Minimed that I perceive.

I'm excited and I wish, just once that someone would speak up about how far along in the process the FDA is in approving this new model of the CGMS. I was on the FDA webpage today and you know what I learned? They've spent some time figuring out that they need to change their systems. It's sort of a downer to find out that the FDA is deep in the process of changing their regulations for device pre-market approval.

Sure, do they need to change something? YES! Countries all over the world are way ahead of us. We're being babied by our Nanny government while other patients in other countries are getting the newest technology. So, hopefully these new processes and new regulations for pre-market approval will HELP. And not have been a waste of precious research time.

La Dee Da and Lovin' Life

2011-08-03T21:14:00.001-05:00

That's a little bit how I feel right now.
La dee da... doot da doo.

Also, I actually went off my pump for 48 hours this week. It's been... more than seven years since I've had that thing in, somewhere, attached to my body, dosing me with insulin all day long. And finally, I said to myself, "you need a backup." and "You need an alternative."

Back to Lantus I went for 48 hours.

You know when you change your shampoo and conditioner and all of a sudden your hair feels sooo smooth and silky? That's how this was. I had the best BG readings in two days than I've had in three weeks. :? I also felt oddly free. I love my pump, don't get me wrong, but not having it on for a while was unbelievably thrilling. I look forward to taking a few breaks here and there in the future. And why not, right?

There's no reason for life to get boring. :D
Oh! and I'm moving to GA in about a month or two. No set date, but my husband's been there since the end of January and now it's finally my turn. Yay!!!!
Take care fellow bloggers,
Bethanne

Stress and Numbers

2011-02-02T20:34:00.000-06:00

BG[CGM]: 88

I had thought my sugars were out of control. That I was in need of another round of basal adjustments. Then my husband left for basic training and wahlaah... even steven. :) So, I deduce... a week or two of anticipation, some anxiety and wee bit of excitement, and too much eating out will make sugars unpredictable. :P

Lovin' the new life.
I hope as I get into a new groove, I can keep up with this blog better.
*fingerscrossed*

Love to all in this new year.
Take care,
Bethanne

The Hesitant Guest

2011-01-08T19:37:00.000-06:00

BG[CGM]: 92

For the first time...in a long time, I went to someone's house and felt obligated to eat. That's never happened to be before. My diabetes wasn't a secret to the host, yet I still felt like I couldn't/shouldn't say no. Part of that has to do with my new diet. Trying to stay low carb has been hard for me. 1) Meat is way more expensive than starch 2) I crave the carbs. And Friday I visited a friend who served a yummy casserole and a banana cake, which, btw, was YUMMY. But I left feeling a tad bit crappy. Weirdly, I felt I would have done better with just the cake. Add in the casserole, with only God knows what hidden carbs... i.e. fake cheese, and I felt a little lost. I bolused, of course, but it wasn't enough.

And I left thinking, "From now on I'll just eat at home and save myself the hassle."

But I do love a good visit!! So, I can't give them up. :D Oh well. it's a battle I will continue to fight.

Enjoy the new week, friends.
With Love,
Bethanne

New Year Count Down

2010-12-29T13:52:00.002-06:00

BG[cgm]: 114

The New Year is sprinting towards me. Though I dare not make any official resolutions, I always have something I'm working on. I'm pre-prenancy weight all ready, which is awesome!! Now I just need to get to my pre-third-kid pregnancy weight. Hahaha. At 155, I could stand to lose a few pounds still.

As a diabetic, weight loss can often be difficult. I know I've struggled with my middle for years. I'm not looking for a miracle. I wouldn't even mind the middle if I wasn't still sitting at 155. So, I'll continue in that vein until I'm happy--could be a month [not likely] or a year or two!

Also, I've gone on a low[er] carb diet in the last couple of weeks [excluding Christmas of course]. I'm much happier now. I find my sugar swings are not as drastic. My insulin intake is WAY lower than it was immediately following the birth of my daughter [when I was still averaging about 240g CHO a day!!]. When I realized how much I was still eating, I was floored. ha! Stop EATING! :D

Anyhoo... the baby is doing wonderfully yet she's the most high-maintenance baby I've had so far. Likes to be held ALL THE TIME. So, outside of daily living skills, i'm not sure what kind of goals to make for the new year.
How about you?
You got anything on your plate for the New Year?

Hiding Food

2010-12-12T17:41:00.004-06:00

BG[CGM]: 286 Argh. It's cookie exchange day, and though I haven't had a cookie since 3pm, my sugars are still WAY OUT OF WHACK!

Speaking of cookies, I always chuckle when I hear stories about parents who have hidden sweets from their diabetic children. It's true, though. Even my parents must have done it. It was their way of protecting me and loving me, too. I have to to admit, if one of my children were diagnosed with diabetes, I would probably stop buying cookies and sweets all together. In my heart, I know that isn't fair to the rest of the kids, but I also know my kids, and I would be so afraid that the temptation would be so hard. :(

The funny thing about hiding food is that my husband and I used to do it with kids who AREN'T diabetic. I remember when our oldest was about 2. Matt and I stood at the counter, with our backs to the living area, and we each ate from the cookie stash [yes, this was pre-pump days. what a nightmare!]. At the first hint of movement from behind us, we were stuffing the last bit into our mouth and quickly reshelving the package.

Even more ironically than that is the fact that I now have to hide my healthy food from the family [and when I say family, i mean MATT!]. The nuts I buy--gone before I know it. I've been considering buying a thing of natural peanut butter [the sugar content is sooo darn high in the regular stuff], but first I have to find a place to hide it. The regular NOT lowfat yogurt?? Fuhgetaboutit. :P :D

I forgot PICTURES!!!

2010-11-27T08:13:00.002-06:00

Sugar Pie!

New Stuff

2010-11-26T15:18:00.002-06:00

BG[CGM]: 86

We have a baby!
November 2, 2010 Darla Josephine joined our family. Weighing in at 8 pounds and 10 oz, she was no peanut. :) But we're all happy she's here. Yippee.

Diabetes is driving me nuts, but it's not out of control. Most likely, I'm just tired and that makes handling the diabetes more annoying. The ups and downs are a little too frequent for my liking, but I have a new doctor and we're working together to get it right.

...but, like most doctors I know. SUCH TINY BABY STEPS!! Ack. I end up making my own changes before a doctor gets it right. :P But I do like the doctor and he's keen on the pump. So I have to give him a chance before I run roughshod over him. haha.

Long Time No See

2010-10-30T17:27:00.002-05:00

BG[CGM]: 60

I'm having a baby in 3 days.
*clapping* Whoo hooo!!!

I'm so ready for this crazy ride to be OVER.
Diabetes is treating me pretty well. It's a serious roller coaster, but the ups and downs haven't been debilitating. Handling it well with my pump and CGMS.

I feel I need a break from the CGMS, actually. So, though I'll be wearing it for a few weeks post delivery, I look forward to the day when I can take it off and give it a rest. Not forever, because I have come to rely on the little bugger, but just for a couple weeks. Back to the basics. Strip testing actually sounds like fun. LOL :D

I did hook up with a doctor recently. An Endocrinologist who I think is going to be good for me. When I got pregnant I was on the verge of breaking away from my PCP of Internal Medicine for someone more specialized. Lucky me, the CDE at my OB/GYN clinic had a name of someone highly recommended. I have an appointment with him on November 12th. Will keep you posted on how that goes. My fingers are crossed. :D

Otherwise... i'm a bit tired.
And ready to snuggle my new little baby.
Have a great start to November, friends!!!
See you with pictures as soon as I can get back on.
~Bethanne

Biggest Loser

2010-10-14T16:46:00.005-05:00

BG[CGM]: 43, but don't worry I had a glass of OJ... as a matter of fact, I ate a cookie, too.

So my kids are into Biggest Loser again--and when I said kids, I mean me. :P One of the contestants is from NY, on many pills, and also a type II diabetic who takes...

30 units of insulin at EVERY MEAL!!

Yes, you heard me correctly. I was shocked. Course, this is a big guy. Obviously, he made it onto the Biggest Loser, right? But still, I sorta gasped and thought, wow. That is more insulin that I bolus in a normal/conservative day...

and then I hit the third trimester in this pregnancy. *blush* My bolus average went from 20-30 at the beginning of this great event to now--60-70 units of insulin bolused in a day. EEEK! My breakfast carb to insulin ratio is at 3:1, but really if I don't want a spike, I have to do some math in my head and get 2:1. The pump doesn't offer that option. :/ Bad Minimed!!! :P :D

I have a few weeks left...
I CAN NOT WAIT FOR THIS TO BE OVER!

A Diabetes Meme

2010-09-08T19:22:00.003-05:00

A Diabetes Meme.

Finally, a blog meme just for those of us with wonky pancreases (and for the people who love us). If you're in the mood for meme'ing today, have at it!

What type of diabetes do you have: Type 1

When were you diagnosed: November 1988 (22 years!!)

What's your current blood sugar: 141. i'm working on my post dinner levels :P

What kind of meter do you use: One Touch Ultra that hooks up with my awesome Minimed pump.

How many times a day do you test your blood sugar: With the CGMS, about 4-5x on the meter, and the CGMS picks up about 200+ more throughout 24 hours. :D I really love saying that.

What's a "high" number for you: Anything over 160 mg/dl.

What do you consider "low": Anything under 60 mg/dl.

What's your favorite low blood sugar reaction treater: Orange juice, except for now that I'm pregnant it will actually depend on the time of day. From midnight to 10am, all I need is a small glass of milk and my sugar will skyrocket. Other times of the day, it's the usual juice or sweet treat--brownie?

Describe your dream endo: Involved and vocal, yet willing to hear what I have to say about MY disease.

What's your biggest diabetes achievement: Having four healthy babies and being able to do one more [but that's it!! NO MORE! *knock on wood*]

What's your biggest diabetes-related fear: Staying so healthy only to have it all end badly anyway... on the other hand, diabetes or not, life always ends with death, so I don't know what the heck I'm hoping for. Oh! that reminds me of the movie, Sleepless in Seattle! Remember??? :D Sort of. The line about relationships ending badly, if it wasn't bad, it wouldn't be ending!

Who's on your support team: My husband, close friends, indirectly, my family, and my OB/GYN team for now!

Do you think there will be a cure in your lifetime: No.

What is a "cure" to you: I can't say I've thought about this. A cure doesn't always mean healing. Except for the financial burden, I don't mind the management...and it keeps getting better, too.

The most annoying thing people say to you about your diabetes is: "You can't eat that." (uh, yeah, thanks dude. I don't know what I've been doing without you for the last 20 years)

What is the most common misconception about diabetes: All the promotions and cool drugs are for type I, and that if I just exercise and diet I'll be able to manage this disease a-okay.

If you could say one thing to your pancreas, what would it be: "It would be nice if you could at least pick up some kind of signal... wifi, DirectTV?"

Waiting on RX

2010-09-06T14:33:00.003-05:00

I got a call not long ago from my pump company. I have to admit, I ignored the call. I have something of an outstanding balance on my account, and since I didn't need any supplies, I didn't feel like talking to the accounting department, either. *blush* Well, last week, I mentioned to my dear hubby that we needed to cut down the balance a bit so that I could reorder some supplies. Did that, check! Then was told, there hadn't been a hold on the account afterall. Oh, really? Why did you call then??

"Your Rx for sensors is expired. We faxed the doctor and he renewed everything BUT the sensors." Ugh.

First of all, I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S BEEN A YEAR!!! Wow, a year on sensors, and A1Cs in the 5s the entire time. :D BONUS! The proof is in the pudding, people, even if it is sugar free. haha. anyhoo. So now I'm waiting for that Rx to go through and hoping that I can get what I need before I run out.

DOH! Stupid, silly me.
Lesson learned: Don't avoid the hard stuff.

School's Back in Session

2010-08-13T10:50:00.002-05:00

BG[CGM]: 78

Somehow, the idea of a schedule brings a smile to my face. The kids need it, I need it. Whoot! Next week, we get back into it. Early mornings, late afternoon homework sessions, allotted TV and Wii times. Order, or a sense of it, anyway.

In case you're curious, I'm 26 weeks along today. And as I've gone as early as 37 weeks before, I like to think I have about ten weeks left. *wink* :D It's all about positive perspective, right? I've found my insulin resistance to be confounding! The funniest [or ironicest] part is that no one ever even said those words to me in four previous pregnancies. Sure, adjusting my insulin was still part of the deal, but I can NOT believe how much knowledge comes in a small battery operated transmitter. There's no way I had control over this like I do now. I'm still in awe even after 26 weeks. :D I cannot recommend the CGMS and pump combination enough, especially for pregnancy.

In other news, my hubby is now employed by the US Army and is officially on the reserves list until he goes to Basic Training in January. How blessed for us that he will be here for the new baby and Christmas...not to mention the six months for the kids to let his absence sink in. I want to soak up all this time we have, soak up his presence, him. Lots of pictures are the order of the season. :D Lots of hugs and kisses and snuggling and wrestling--for the kids. *wink* LOL

Every thing in life makes a mark on how my disease is managed. There's a learning curve for each new situation. I would love to hear of any other diabetics out there who spend a significant amount of time without their spouses.
Have a great weekend,
~Bethanne

Bethanne-ology

2010-08-08T18:58:00.002-05:00

I picked this up from a fellow blogger, www.singlewhitediabetic.wordpress.com, and I'm not sure where she got it... but I thought it would be fun filler for this week.

Let others know a little more about yourself, re-post this as your name followed by “ology”.

***********FOODOLOGY***************
What is your salad dressing of choice? – Ranch <--BORING! I know! Raspberry vinaigrette is tied for first, depending on my mood.
What is your favorite sit-down restaurant? – Olive Garden
What food could you eat every day for two weeks and not get sick of? – Ice Cream
What are your pizza toppings of choice? – Bacon, mushroom and Chicken
What do you put on your toast? – Butter and strawberry simply fruit

***********TECHNOLOGY***************
How many televisions are in your house? – One.
How many computers? – Two, now. A desk top and laptop.
What kind of cell phone do you have? – Samsung with Net10 pre-bought minutes.
Do you have an iPod? – No.

***************BIOLOGY******************
Are you right-handed or left-handed? – Right
Have you ever had anything removed from your body? – a cyst on my lip and one on my shoulder.
What is the last heavy item you lifted? – laundry basket
Have you ever been knocked unconscious? – KNOCKED? No.

************BULLOLOGY**************
If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die? NO!
If you could change your name, what would you change it to? – I already got lucky enough to change my name... I made it STRASSER.
Would you drink an entire bottle of hot sauce for $1000? – Hmm, everything in me wants to say yes, but I probably couldn't do it.

************DUMBOLOGY******************
How many pairs of flip flops do you own? Two.
Last time you had a run-in with the cops? – We had an issue once while living in Denver. That was 2000, maybe '01?
Last person you talked to? – Daughter
Last person you hugged? – Matt
Last person you kissed? – Matt

**************FAVORITOLOGY****************
Season? – FALL!!!!
Holiday? – Christmas
Day of the week? – Sunday
Month? – September

***********CURRENTOLOGY*****************
Missing someone? – It's hard to miss people when they are only a click away.
Mood? – Raring to go
What are you listening to? – The kids chat
Watching? – My computer screen
Worrying about? – Nothing

***************RANDOMOLOGY*****************
First place you went this morning? – Church
What’s the last movie you saw? – The Sandlot
Do you smile often? – Yes
Sleeping alone tonight? – No

***************OTHER-OLOGY*****************
Do you always answer your phone? – No.
If you could change your eye color what would it be? – More Blue, LOL
Do you own a digital camera? – Yes.
Have you ever had a pet fish? – No.
Favorite Christmas song(s)? – Golly--it's way too soon! Um, White Christmas. O Holy Night.
What’s on your wish list for your birthday? – A haircut... or an e-reader.
Can you do push ups? – Yes
Can you do a chin up? – Maybe ONE or TWO.
Does the future make you more nervous or excited? – EXCITED!
Do you have any saved texts? – No
Ever been in a car wreck? – No. A fender-bender, yes.
Do you have an accent? – No, everyone else has an accent.
What is the last song to make you cry? – Lots of songs make me cry when I'm pregnant.
Plans tonight? – WRITE and watch That 70s Show
Have you ever felt like you hit rock bottom? – Yes.
Name 3 things you bought yesterday? – Calculator, phone card, diet cola
Have you ever been given roses? – Yes
Current worry? – None, duh. See above.
Current hate right now? – I can't think of anything, except the fact that they're building a mosque at ground zero. I DON'T GET THAT!!!
Met someone who changed your life? – Yes. My son.
How will you bring in the New Year? – Even I don’t plan that far away
What song represents you? – I don't do thoughtful and philosophical. I have no idea.
Name three people who might complete this? – I can't.
Would you go back in time if you were given the chance? – Definitely! there is so much cool stuff in history!!
Have you ever dated someone longer than a year solid? – Yes
Do you have any tattoos/piercings? – Pierced ears
Will you be in a relationship 4 months from now? – Most definitely.
Does anyone love you? – Yes.
Would you be a pirate? – Yes!
What songs do you sing in the shower? – Not very often.
Ever had someone sing to you? – Yes.
When did you last cry? – Recently, just not sure when, exactly.
Do you like to cuddle? – Yes
Have you held hands with anyone today? – Yes. Church is good for that.
Who was the last person you took a picture of? – Family
What kind of music did you listen to in elementary school? – I have no idea!
Do you believe in staying close with your ex’s? – No.
Are most of the friends in your life new or old? – Both.
Do you like pulpy orange juice? – Yes.
What is something your friends make fun of you for? – Hmmm... my friends make fun of me???? :D

Sooo, I've been a little neglectful

2010-08-05T21:02:00.003-05:00

And I've been contemplating it, too.
At first I thought it was just a case of too busy, too lazy.
Now, I'm not so sure.
Here's the thing, we live diabetes so much. We are focused on sugars and food the majority of the day. For me, about 60 percent.

I'm trying to cut back. I've found a wonderful routine. I've got a GREAT certified diabetes educator on my team who helps me. I've got a pregnancy that is going so darn smoothly, there are days I don't feel diabetic at all.

The question is, how do I incorporate that into my blog?
I want people to know that diabetes can be managed well.
But if I come in here more than a couple times a week, my focus becomes the diabetes.
And you know what? I'm more than my illness. <--and I didn't even need to read the book to figure that out. :D

On the other hand, I do love to blog. I don't think I'm ready to close this one down.
Is there such a thing as a blogging identity crisis?! haha. I think there is and I'm having one.

Hi FRIENDS! It's finally AUGUST! My kids will be back in school soon. My days will find routine. My writing efforts will increase. My new baby will grow so that I am uncomfortable [and fat]. And I will prepare for my husband's coming departure for Basic Training, which happens at the end of January. Yup. There is a lot to do this fall.

I hope, hope, hope and pray that your diabetic life is as full as mine, that you find yourself looking forward to tomorrow with an ambition that will push you to succeed despite the doubts and uncertainties.
Come back soon. I'm going to do a VLOG!
With Love,
Bethanne

What the Kids Hear

2010-06-24T20:28:00.002-05:00

BG[CGM]: 120

Tonight was sooo cute. My Number Three, after playing Wii for about an hour or so, came to me with complaints of feeling sick. He looked a little off as well, so I asked him if he felt like he was going to throw up. I suggested we get a towel and a trashcan and set him up on the floor in the living room where he could watch a movie and relax. As I prepared, he came back to me and said, "I think it's just low blood sugar."

I bit my smile back. Seriously! He is sooooo cute! And I asked him if he would like some juice. He nodded his head and got his juice. Then laid down in the living room to watch Cars.

The really funny thing is that about 5 minutes after Number Three came to me and I had him all settled down, Number Four threw up. Ugh!

In other news...
Doing this pregnancy with a CGMS and with an attentive CDE [certified diabetes educator] who is familiar with the insulin pump has been soooo different. Enlightening, really. I always had [good]better control during pregnancy before. I checked my sugars more, etc. BUT I never could have talked about how my sugar levels were trending. No one ever talked about what I should expect my sugars to do. Even with my favorite doctor in the whole world, Dr. Ronald Thomas, I would bring my logbook in and he would look at it and we would talk about how the sugars looked...

I know, I must have had some advice for basal rates, but I can't remember. I honestly don't think of diabetes when I think of my previous pregnancies. Weird, huh? Maybe it's that I don't really think about diabetes when I think of me.

AND THAT is a good thing, if you ask me. :D
Enjoy this next weekend.
Though we don't have any of our own cucumbers yet, we got some from out neighbor and YUM!! I'm so happy it's summer! I love the garden!!
Let me know if you have a garden this summer. I hear Ohio is a great place to have a garden!
~Bethanne

Diabetes on the Go

2010-06-19T16:00:00.002-05:00

BG[CGM]: 77

After two weeks on the road, I am soooo happy to be home! I found my diabetes was managable. I had some what-the moments, but over all that was to be expected. Weddings, days at the beach, eating out... it gets tiring to have to be so aware of everything that could possibly effect my diabetes. Checking often and eating moderately was worth the effort, though. :D Me and my shoebox full of supplies made it home--happy and healthy.

I'm halfway through my pregnancy [well, almost halfway, but it just sounds so nice, doesn't it???]. The baby is moving a ton but too small to make me uncomfortable. I have an appointment on Monday and expect I'll find everything is normal.

have a great week all you friends out there. Enjoy the sunshine!!
~Bethanne

June

2010-06-01T19:54:00.002-05:00

BG[CGM]: 76 and falling. Really?! Again?! Now?!

:D June is going to be crazy.
If I'm not posting, you know why.
Summer = kids, travel, offline/real life activities...

When I am at the computer, I'll be making up for lost time on my manuscripts.

Have a great month.
I'll see you soon.
~Bethanne

Trying to get back on TRACK

2010-05-25T21:50:00.003-05:00

BG[CGM]: 80

I took a vacation to NY and visited my family there. GREAT time. GREAT company. Wacky sugars. I only ate out a few times, and really tried to keep things even, but I think my sugars are starting to have issues with the new baby. I don't think it's my behavior as much as circumstance that is rocking my boat.

Well, what can you do. I expected some wackiness. Tomorrow I meet with my CDE and OB/GYN for a week 14 check up. Should be able to get things back on track.

BTW, if you ever get the chance to do a food tour in NYC, GO FOR IT! It was wonderful. The food, as you can imagine, was WONDERFUL! The historian tour guide engaged me and captivated me with her stories and knowledge. I could really tell she loved the city. It was a job, but it was more. That made it special.

Hope everyone is doing fine out there with their D-lives.
Take care,
Bethanne

Leg Abuse

2010-05-14T16:48:00.002-05:00

BG[CGM]: 95

After some discussion on tudiabetes, I was surprised to find that people are wearing their CGMS sensor and transmitter combos on their legs and even their arms!! *Gasp* I know!! So, I took a leap today and went with my leg.

So far so good. I did have one moment when I ran into the short counter in my kitchen and rapped the transmitter. OUCH! It ended up causes some pain and a WEAK signal, which shot me over to the Start screen, but I'd just experienced that with a previous sensor so I sorta knew what to expect.

The only thing I'm having trouble with right now is finding a place to hang my pump with maternity clothes on. Pants are just not the same without a waistband! I have several of the variety that are soft in front with a regular waist on the back, but there's a new variety on the market since I was pregnant five years ago...

SOFT ALL THE WAY AROUND! It's like a band of stretch material that goes around your belly. It's going to be an interesting hurdle.

Well, take care out there.
~Bethanne

A day late...

2010-05-12T19:53:00.002-05:00

BG[CGM]: 94

I just can't keep up. Seriously. I'm always a day late on this D-blogging stuff. I did hear about an 'event' this week... a blogging event. I'm going to assume there are different themes for each day. I don't know how people do it--keep up with what everyone else is doing. :D LOL

Anyhoo... Kerri is talking about low glucose kits of today and the past--but mostly the past. I too remember the chalky tablets, and I've had my share of glucagon injections [but those came a little later in life when my hormones ruled everything about my life and my husband was already taking on a task that he probably would never have asked for if he'd really known about it beforehand]. Okay, I value myself more than that... still, I wonder if he ever wondered what he was getting himself into.

What I remember MOST as a kid were the nights my parents would shove a tube of decorating frosting into my mouth, bits at a time. I understand why they had to do it. I wouldn't hold a cup of juice. I couldn't chew or even hardly swallow. But that frosting would just get absorbed into my body as soon as it hit my mouth, eventually most of it going down my throat. I hated it. I hated waking up with blue everywhere... But that was the life, you know?

Nursing School

2010-05-06T21:50:00.002-05:00

BG[meter]: 86
BG[CGM]: Sensor Error *shrug* I don't know. I just started the damn thing over again, and hope for a better run. I am on day 4, so calling the company would be pointless. Their sensors are tested for a 3 day run, no more. Anymore finagling is up to me.

After reading Holly's blog today, I got to thinking about when I was diagnosed and the upheaval/emotional rollercoaster it put into motion. Oh, I wouldn't ever look back and call it upheaval. I definitely remember ups and downs. I can easily commiserate with other d-bloggers who share my experience, but overall I had a pretty happy childhood.

Hind sight being 20/20, now that I've touched the d-community online, I can see how I missed out on sharing my disease, sharing who I was with people who really understood. No one really gets it unless they get it... you know? All the books in the world [like, I am not my Illness, which I never did read. Sorry Mom!] are not going to make a person feel less alone. God helps in that instance, but God also gave us to us...he gave us community, family, church, knowing that in our humanity we would need other people.

I had a lot of people in my life to support me and love me. I just didn't have diabetes people. I never did get to a diabetes camp. Hmm. Maybe I'm forgetting something. I do remember a gal in high school who had diabetes, but I went to a LARGE high school, and we never really connected. My neighbor friend was diagnosed with diabetes, but we moved. Pfft.

Now, I have my husband Matt who understands me when my disease is front and center. When my facial expressions are just a hair off because my sugars have dropped or my pump is beeping at me because my sugar is high. He keeps up with the new stuff and is interested in keeping me working correctly. It's like we were made one... oh that's right. We were. :D

Wow, there was a time, I never would have even admitted high sugars existed. I'm one of those people who didn't understand that it wasn't my fault. I would fudge logs, lie about numbers when asked... [it's amazing that I can't remember having any A1c's over 8 in my adult lifetime] Highs happen, even when I do everything right. It's freeing to admit that, and oddly enough it makes the highs that ARE my fault [forgetting to bolus, overeating] easier to be accountable for.

Lots of Blood Work

2010-05-03T10:23:00.004-05:00

BG: 78

I met my new OB/GYN last week. I was extremely pleased with the visit. Dr. Rodrigo inspired confidence by making me comfortable. He addressed my concerns all the while confirming that he knew what he was doing. Since I've done this a few times, it was nice to hear him speak of things of which I am familiar. And even better news, he's okay with going for a natural [and by natural, I mean vaginal] delivery, IF everything is still honky-dory at that point in the pregnancy. So, that's my goal... to keep things going smoothly as much as is possible and in my hands. Which reminds me, this week: get blood work taken care of. An ungodly amount of baseline bloodwork. Whooppee!

When it comes down to it though, if that can't happen, I'll be pleased to have Dr. Rodrigo in charge of cutting me open. :D

Have I lost anyone yet? hahaha.

Diabetes plays a role in my life, no matter what. My sugars have been keen for the last few weeks. I'm quite happy with them, even though I've been quite unhappy with my CGMS. It works well for what it's guarantees...and I guess I shouldn't ask more than that except for when I hear Kerri Sparling's delivery story and she says that she had to remove her CGM prior to the C-section...and the removal was on day FIFTEEN!!! Why does she get fifteen days... IN HER LEG?! If I put my CGM anywhere besides my abdomen, sides and part of the back, I no longer have that guarantee. So SUCKY! The longest I've pulled from a Minimed sensor is 6 days, but by then, it was starting to itch and irritate under all that irritating tape.

So, I have to think back to why I chose the Minimed over the Dexcom--thank God for Blogger. And I remember, I really wanted the integrated system. I was more comfortable on the Minimed than the Dexcom after trying both of them. I still love that about the Minimed. But I'll tell you something, when the warranty is up on this Minimed, if Dexcom and Animas FINALLY have a system set up together, I'll be looking to make some more comparisons. I'll be looking for that pie in the sky. ;-)

Sunday Posts

2010-04-25T12:59:00.003-05:00

BG[CGM]: 177 and trending down. Panera Bread day at Church makes for a very carb-ridden lunch. :D

I've found a simple routine. Posting on Sundays. Though there are times I fret that I can't get into my blogger account to do more, I just can't do too much more!! :)

What's going on in Diabetesworld today?
Though it isn't said when the study was done, success was met for a small trial of an Artificial Pancreas. READ HERE. The article mentions the AP is comprised of a glucose monitor [inserted directly into the vein], insulin pump and use of both hormones, insulin and glucagon. It's an interesting read as it talks about how to make something absolutely personal universal. Though they are able to adust the parameters of the APs function so that the test group as a whole resulted in no hypoglycemia, it does mention that a percent of the group was settling for blood sugars that were slightly higher than the original rate i.e. the rate that cause some of the group to experience hypoglycemic reactions. So the question is... is that satisfactory?

They want to combine this new technology with the Continuous Glucose Monitoring System. Which brings me to another topic. Do they really think the CGM is good enough? Lately, I'm having some doubts that it would be accurate enough to regulate my body without human interaction. Yes, the sensor has been good for me. Yes it helps me see trends, but unless that sensor is in a frickin' vein, it's not enough for me to treat myself. Usually, and this is expected so I'm not complaining, my sugars are already high when the CGM senses the trend up. And I'm pretty darn low when it starts sensing the trend down. Likewise, coming up from that low happens much more quickly than the CGM senses so that I'm often getting alarms when I'm already over 100. CGMS is for the BIG PICTURE, and because of it, my sugars are tighter and my A1C is below six. But that not saying it is all that helpful for warnings... or determing the need for glucagon and/or insulin. I don't know. Show me more!! I'm interested!

Dead Beat Tired

2010-04-18T15:02:00.002-05:00

BG[CGM]: 130
BG[meter]: 182

Okay, so pregnancy is beating the you know what out of me. I just woke up from an hour and a half nap. I never nap. Maybe short little 15 minutes of shut eye... but you know.

I'm throwing masochistic regulations out the window and taking my preNatal vitamins pretty close to dinner, before bed and with a snack. That way, I don't spend the first half of the day worshipping the porcelain god, which I did twice this week. :D Not fun! I figure, it's a pill full of vitamins and a bunch of good stuff... it goes, it ought to get absorbed...at least partially. If there are other opinions on that matter, I don't care to hear them. That's my theory and I'm sticking to it.

Oddly enough, I don't feel my diabetes is too off. Sugars aren't out of whack as can be expected. I've had a couple of weird highs, but otherwise they've stayed on the lower side. A good thing if you ask me. I've also been able to keep up with my exercise regimen except for those two days of worshipping.

Speaking of customer service, even though we weren't, I ended up changing my sensor and having some issues again then talked to another customer service rep. She was nice. It really pays to be nice.

It can be a rotten world out there. Nice gets you farther. Everyone should give it a try... [or get dismissed, anyway!]
Have a great week!!!
Take care of yourselves.
Bethanne

One More

2010-04-12T15:00:00.000-05:00

BG[CGM]: 123

Official Test Results are IN.
Darla is on the Way.

Click for TWO PINK LINES... and a little country music smile.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I'm sharing here, but I've also set up a blog just for baby and pregnancy talk. I'm pretty easy going since I've done this a few times--four actually. I'm looking for a good doctor, and expect that won't take too long. I'm watching my sugars closely, have been for a good while. With two 5.8 HbA1c results in a row, I'm actually looking forward to this. Not that it isn't a surprise! Cuz it is! I didn't realize how comfortable I'd gotten with my life until this popped up. Now I'm like... wow, I thought I was done!!! I really thought I was through with baby stuff and all that. YIKES! I'm not done with it. Um... I better stop thinking about it now.

Customer Service

2010-04-10T14:02:00.003-05:00

BG[CGM]: 77
BG[meter]: 148, Don't F with me, customer service representative!!!! I KNOW when my sensor is OFF--and by OFF, I do mean NOT SENSING CORRECTLY.

Okay, I feel a little like swearing right now. Grrr. I just spent 20 minutes on the phone with a telemarketing bimbo. Seriously, she was THE WORST employee of Minimed I have ever had the displeasure of encountering. I wanted to jump through the phone and kick her ass all the way to Taiwan. It was alot like talking to the ATT representative we occasionally need to call and ream a knew one because they have overcharged our bill...again. That's how irritated I was.

I told her my sensor wasn't following with my sugars. That it had been reading in the 70's since 3am. I told her I calibrated at 6am. I told her that when my sugar rose after breakfast, the sensor stayed in the 70's. Do you want to know what she said?

"The sensor is meant to trend with your sugars."

You're kidding me, right? That's the F what I'm saying!! But it's NOT DOING THAT! This was after a very long drawn out conversation about all that had happened that morning... how my calibration at 11:30 was a BAD calibration because it was a low sugar.

So what? My problem started LONG before 11am. You can't blame an 11am calibration--one made in utter frustration--for all the problems that happened prior to it. Besides which.... a 48 isn't necessarily a BAD calibration. She ASSUMED that because the sugar was 48, it was unstable. That's what the book says, on a stable meter reading. It doesn't say, a meter reading between 70-120. IF my suagar had been in the fifties for more than an hour that would be pretty darn stable. NOT ideal, but stable.

I finally told her I was going to fly to California so I could kick her ass....

Actually no. I told her I was going to hang up the phone now, that I was getting too angry to keep talking to her. That I would track my sensor and meter readings through the afternoon and call again later. AND NOT TALK TO HER!

The technology isn't perfect, but I know it can work well. I'm smart enough to realize when something is not quite right.

On a brighter note, did I tell you my April A1c was 5.8! :D

Finding that special Someone

2010-04-07T18:21:00.002-05:00

BG[CGM]: 42
meter: 57, after days of high afternoons I changed my basal rates, but will apparently have to knock it down a bit.

Finding doctors.
I was looking for a doctor, not because mine has fallen short. No, I needed to get a yearly, but my ob/gyn left town in the fall. I didn't really think we'd still be hanging around, so I never bothered looking for someone new. Now, the time has come when I hate to put off a good[for me] thing....

Ugh. Back to the drawing board. This doctor finding process is so tedious! *sigh* Oh well. I shall seek and find. Wish me luck, I might need it. :D

How do I know I have allergies?

2010-04-02T20:53:00.003-05:00

BG[CGM]: 121

I know I have allergies--and not some kind of cold--because my sugars have not gone up and stayed there. Being sick will do that, send those sugars up. I've been even keel though even though this AWFUL congestion, which I can't sleep through!! I NEED SLEEP! I need naps! I want to be able to breathe!

Can't wait until next week, I'll get my blood word back. I've got another A1C result to look at. Last one was a 5.8. I'm curious to see how it has changed, if it's changed.

Thank God for normal sugars. That's something, anyway, don't you think? :D
Happy Easter, if I don't get on before then.

Taking Breaks

2010-03-29T11:02:00.002-05:00

BG: 70

I ended my CGMS sensor and thought I'd wait to put a new one in. I ran out of tape. :P Wow, it's nice having the continuous look at what my sugars are doing. Within hours off the sensor, I was over 230 after an afternoon eating excursion I'd forgotten to bolus for--if I'm going to forget, it's going to be in the afternoon when the kids are just home from school and life seems a little more hectic. In any case, with my CGMS I would have had a 170 warning that would have reminded me I was off. Big pluses for the CGMS, whether you have a Minimed or a Dexcom. :D

On another note. I cleaned windows today and NICE TO SEE YOU, SPRING! Yikes, those things get dirty during the winter months, don't they? Ick. :D

Have a great week, Friends.
Bethanne

Finally seeing some results!

2010-03-25T13:02:00.002-05:00

BG[CGM]: Below 40, the meter says 38

It is pretty low right now. Ugh. But I've drank juice and eaten, so it's a waiting game now.

I wanted to share that after two months of consistent exercise, I'm finally down ten pounds. I weighed in at 150 today.... YIPPEE!!!! I was jumping up and down and screaming and yelling. Now, I've got a tear in my eye, but that could be more the low sugar speaking than the actual emotion. :D

Thanks for hanging with me as I fight to stay healthy.
With Love,
Bethanne

Still Moving

2010-03-19T12:27:00.003-05:00

BG[CGM]: 180 <-- sometimes I do stupid things, like forget to bolus. *eyeroll*

It's been three and a half weeks since I started my 5K training schedule. I've found that running takes a lot! I'm also proud to say, I've kept moving [this is to say, I'm not exactly always running] during that entire time, and before these scheduled weeks, I was doing some cross training [aerobics and stuff]. I've learned that I like to walk fast, that I'd much rather walk fast and keep up a sweat longer, than to try to run. When I run, I go a shorter distance and for a shorter time, too. :P Today was a rest day, but I did a mile anyway. It felt good.

In a related story...

Last night I left the house on a trip to the library. I made it ALMOST to the Wendy's [about 2ish miles?] and ran out of gas. Did you know, NO ONE HAS A PAY PHONE ANYMORE!!! Not Wendy's, not McDonald's. And me? I'm one of the last hold-outs. I don't own a cell phone. So, I walked about one mile to a friend's house--isn't it nice having friends? :D She drove me home. It wasn't that bad, and I wasn't even mad. I should have remembered that I needed gas, not becuase the gauge was on low. No, our dashboard zonked out weeks ago, but because I knew it had abeen a while since gas was put in there. I think I just felt lucky that I hadn't run out of gas that morning when I was driving 4 kindergarteners and their teacher to the PO for a fieldtrip. Can you imagine?!!?!? that would have been horrifyingly embarrassing!

Sick Days

2010-03-14T20:44:00.002-05:00

BG[CGM]: 86

I have a sick kid!!! Ugh. After a night with the Girl Scouts [more on that in a sec], Hubby decided we'd celebrate by going to breakfast. A nice Sunday brunch at The Restaurant in Warrensburg. I got home and my youngest son was acting a little off--tired. But he'd been up late, so lying on the living room floor for forty minutes was only suspiciously off. When he got up to go, my brain said, "he looks a little pale, Bethanne." But no, I convinced myself he was just tired. His cold was getting him down; he's been congested for a little while.

About ten minutes after the waitress brought our food, my youngest puked all over himself and his plate.

We hurriedly fled the scene. He lounged around all day, lethargic. Eight thirty rolls around, and all of a sudden he wants water... then crackers... and now he's eating noodle soup. And he won't shut up! LOL :D He does love to talk.

Back to the Girl Scouts sleep over. I was just very glad not to have any hypo episodes and have to explain that crazy screeching noise that was coming from my abdomen. Phew. It was a little low when I woke up, but not bad, and nothing the CGMS picked up.

Have a great week everyone!!
~Bethanne

Happy Anniversary

2010-03-13T11:33:00.003-06:00

BG[CGM]: 85

eleven years ago today, I got married. Happy Anniversary, Matt.

Thanks for being such a great support, for learning who I am and how my diabetes changes me. I wish all married diabetics someone just like you.

Love you.

Bethanne

Slipping Away

2010-03-08T16:21:00.002-06:00

BG[CGM]: 111

Time is slipping by so quickly! Spring is even closer than it was a few weeks ago. :D I'm dancing in my head. I'm singing in the rain. I'm just soooo darn happy that it's March.

I'm utilizing two basal patterns on my pump. Wow, it's so awesome. This thing really does alot more than I've given it credit for in the past. Thanks to my minimed rep, I'm slowly learning. It's about time, too.

I've got a busy month... girl scout lock-in, anniversary, dental appointments--I HAVE MY FIRST CAVITY!!!! 33 years, and I'm out of the club. Darn. :( I can't believe it. I thought I would be cavity free my whole life.

I guess that just shows how silly I am. :D

More Basal Testing

2010-03-01T21:32:00.003-06:00

BG[CGM]: 150

This is night ONE for basal testing. I ate dinner and will fast through the night in order to get some good readings on my sugar levels. They are NOT holding steady as they were a month ago! Oh, the frustration of Diabetes. Grr... I also have plans to get with an endocrinologist. I know, you're probably thinking, "what? you don't see one already?" *eyeroll*

It's okay. I have a really GREAT doctor, who is confident in me and my abilities. He listens to me, knowing that I'm the more experienced person. Believe me, that's rare. OTOH, he is also willing to let someone else help, which is why I'll be contacting the endocrinologist soon. HOpefully, she can shed some light on the variable basal rates thing.

On a lighter and much happier note, I'm planning a trip to NYC with a girlfriend of mine. I'm soooo excited!
Have a great week, my friends.
Love,
Bethanne

Fasting

2010-02-26T10:38:00.003-06:00

BG[CGM]: 54 -- had a glass of juice

One of the greatest things about having a pump has been the ability to NOT eat. Fasting is a common factor for me and my faith. Even without diabetes, I've never been an AVID faster, but there are times...like during lent when fasting is something I'd like to be able to do. As a diabetic, I'm not obligated. There are always exceptions for example, being pregnant.

As a pumper, I feel I have the freedom for fasting.
Which takes me back to those days when I first got the Minimed insulin pump. I must have lost about 20 pounds in those first months. My eating habits changed unbelievably. Late night snacks, gone. It was a different world for me. The allowance of some simple sugared foods that before I had avoided or ate with much guilt also brought liberation. Seriously big changes for me.

Now, most of the dieting I do, I do in order to stay healthy and maintain an ideal weight. *thumbsup* AND, I can fast if I want to. :)

Thanks Dean Kamen, you totally made my day when you invented the insulin pump--the Segway PT isn't too bad, either. :D

Time Flies

2010-02-20T11:47:00.002-06:00

BG[CGM]: 96

BG: 176 -- haven't figured that one out yet, but I'll be keeping an eye on things to see if they don't even out. :D

I can't believe how fast time goes!! The Olympics are half over! February is eight days from ending! SPRING IS JUST A SHORT MONTH AWAY!

10 7 things I love about Spring.
1. flowers
2. baby rabbits
3. green leaves
4. bike riding
5. Easter
6. End of the school year right around the corner
7. Tax refunds

Have a great weekend!

~Bethanne

Training

2010-02-15T20:33:00.004-06:00

BG[CGM]: 111

Yes, I'm going to start training...
But not like that. -->
As a friend of mine would say, "He has bigger boobs than I do!"

No. I'm going for the 5K. I've been doing 15 minutes of too easy workouts everyday. It's not working... I mean, I feel a little better, but I want to look better and feel GREAT! I've been on my treadmill twice this weekend [it's lying. it really is when it says I've done a mile in 20 minutes! haha]. I've downloaded a training schedule and I'm hoping my measly practice with the 15 minutes a day will keep my head out of my ass on this venture...

Oh, and no pizza or ice cream anymore, either! I ate both of those over the weekend. Talk about feeling crappy... don't get me wrong. I enjoyed every bite of it, but it's no surprise that I'm feeling down[ish]. :D [The diabetes has waged well against my eating habits this weekend, and for that, I'm grateful.]

Plus, I've still got that wedding to go to in June. Whoot! Kitty Hawk here we come. If I lose 30 pounds, i'm rewarding myself with a new dress....

Valentine's Day is Coming

2010-02-12T15:52:00.002-06:00

BG: 73

I love chocolate. Really love it likes it's the best thing that ever came from a bean.... well, no. Second to coffee. Or even better, coffee and chocolate together. The two best beans EVER!

...and I'm a diabetic. So I take it in small doses--usually.

Is Valentine's Day hard for me? No. I think holidays like this probably used to stink. I grew up in the if-you-eat-that-you'll-die era. My parents were probably on the easy-going side. I remember a gal who lived with military strictness in regard to her diabetes. Eeek.

Nowadays, when I look at chocolate, I see fat--not high blood sugars. And that's enough for me to steer clear.

Valentine's Day is a wonderful holiday for me because I'm married to the love of my life and have four beautiful children whom I love.... I can't beat that. We're going to all see a movie that day, come home for dinner, then [apparently] Matt has a Yummy Surprise for everyone. Hmm. I wonder!!! :D

Enjoy your weekend.
Have a wonderful Loved-filled Holiday.
~Bethanne

Heredity

2010-02-10T20:34:00.002-06:00

BG[CGM]: 119
BG: 144

I read the About page on the www.rescuemeids.com page, a company that makes medic alert tags and some other helpful stuff for diabetics. The woman who owns the company is a mother of three. She has a sister with Type I diabetes, a son who was diagnosed at 13 months and another son diagnosed later. CRAZY!

Does this worry me? Yes. It does. I hate to think the people I love will have to deal with the same stuff I do... on the other hand, better my kids than some unsuspecting fool! Right? Could I be a help? Would it just be one more parental chain around a growing kid's neck?

Maybe, maybe not. Diabetes is a rough road--and I know at least one of my kids who would think he had died if he couldn't eat sweets whenever he wanted to [knock on wood]--not that I let him now... haha.

I realize God knows how much we can handle, but in my human frailty, I would question his accuracy if that did happen.

Tricky disease stay away from mine!

Roller Coaster Trips

2010-02-09T11:20:00.002-06:00

BG[CGM]: 163

Travelled to Michigan this weekend. We are so blessed! The weather was FABULOUS. We left our hometown drenched in a freezing rain, drove two hours to sunshine and dry roads. Enjoyed a clear weekend with friends and family, then came home only to drive straight back into blizzard-like weather. :P I shoveled the drive this morning. 30 minutes of hard work.

One thing, though. I've never had so much trouble with my diabetes on a road trip! When I upload my pump and sensor data to my computer it's going to be like an awesome Cedar Point roller coaster! Up and down, never stopping. Ugh! I'm still on the high end today and that is irritating me even more because I'm eating normal, I'm doing normal activities... where's the love?!

Couple of things. Food. I didn't eat well over the weekend. I felt enlightened after watching my friend's husband make his own beer. He started the process by boiling wheat...then adding hops and malt and coriander and...the best, some kind of cornsyrup!

First things first, this was the best beer I've ever tasted. I enjoyed a glass from his previous brew and it was rich. So rich. So yummy. Thick... and after watching him make it, I added about thirty more carbs for that glass. :D When I drink, I usually go for the light beer. And now I'm curious how they make the light beer. I'll have to put in a request!

So, anyway Pizza at the Superbowl party. Another yum.
It was an incredibly eating weekend. I enjoyed myself, enjoyed the company...and need to do extra workouts this week to make up for it. Next time, we'll have to visit on a NON-occasion weekend. Maybe that will help, eh?

Alzheimers

2010-02-02T15:44:00.002-06:00

BG[CGM]: 160

Alzheimers runs in my family, so I know that possibility is there...

But there are times when I wonder if it's not Alzheimers, it's a loose mouth. :D Matt is often exasperated because I will ask him the same question three times in any number of hours. For example, What are you doing tomorrow? Then again later that day, So, what are you doing tomorrow? Finally, I'm likely to ask the next morning, what are you doing today?

I had a moment today when I thought to myself, are you just running your mouth without thinking? If you really thought about the question, would you find you know the answer? I was sitting down to lunch and, half talking to myself, said "What will we have for dinner?" But I know what we're having for dinner! I had just been talking about it with Matt because he was eating it for LUNCH! I just didn't think.

By the way, we're having turkey potpie, which is GREAT except I made the pie filling last night, and since then three people have dipped into the pot... so my pie is a little shallow. ;-) haha!

I think I'm going to try to think more. Good plan, huh? LOL
Had a pretty crappy D day, with highs and a sensor error two times... ugh. I think I'm doing better now. I had to change my infusion site, and from now on I think I will just avoid that area on the side of my gluteous maximus. It never absorbs well there and I end up with highs.

Bolus Delivery

2010-01-27T21:41:00.002-06:00

BG: 53
CGM: 55 <-- do you see what I mean about a working transmitter and decent freaking trends? LOL :D I think I'm lucky because my trending is so even keel. Except for the occasional spike or dip, my BGs roll, meaning even when I rise, I usually take some time to do it. When I go low, same thing... That helps the CGM readings stay closer to BG levels. Anyhoo. I'm eating too much at bedtime. I need to eat too much, I should say. Not sure how to mess with my doses, just yet, but for sure, I'll be lowering some dinner time basals.

I wanted to touch on my Bolus Delivery. I love my pump, you know that. It has three different delivery types for whenever I eat. A normal gives me my entire dose at one time. A square gives me the dose over a period of X minutes. And the dual delivers both--normal and square. I've learned to LOVE this feature. High fat foots do not allow sugars to be absorbed as easily, so I know eating a steak or a couple peices of pizza are going to give me more of a spike later. And wahlah! now I can take a square bolus and get insulin coverage for a longer period of time.

I'll have to do some research and questioning when I see my MM rep next Friday, because I was thinking tonight... if I use a square bolus for my bagel, will that allow me to cover my food without going too much lower than I already am? Do you see what I mean? I don't want to eat an entire bagel adn NOT bolus, but when my sugar gets this low, I hate to bolus at all until I feel better.

I'm tired though. and ready for bed... and I know that I ate enough, because not only did I eat that bagel that I square bolused for, I drank a glass of orange juice[<--the other reason I dont' want to go to bed without bolusing. High alert in another hour!!] Well, thanks for listenign to be ramble tonight.
Have a great day tomorrow.
With Love,
Bethanne

Lifted

2010-01-26T12:05:00.003-06:00

BG[CGM]: 89 -- new transmitter has made a WORLD of difference. :D I'm keeping up my 15 minutes of exercise a day. And overall, I can't complain about how diabetes is treating me. Life is good.

Last night I sat down to watch Castle with my hubby. A short 60 minute program on ABC. I say short, because you know how those networks are always cutting a minute from the front and back of the hour. You know what was worse? Seven, yes SEVEN commercial breaks, three at five minutes long and four at about 2-3 minutes. I went to bed just plain discouraged. What is the world coming to? Twenty years ago, I would watch an hour episode of Macgyver and actually watch 48 minutes of programming. Today, we're lucky to get thirty-five minutes. 35!!!

Being so disgusted last night, I was blessed to witness something today. While shopping at my local Aldi store for the weekly shopping, I got in line and saw a woman. I didn't notice she was upset at first. Then, as I moved closer, I heard the cashier telling her that the man in line after her had paid for her groceries while she had stepped aside to call someone because her card wasn't working. The woman looked confused at first, and the cashier had to repeat herself. As I finished being rung up, the woman was on her cell phone and she was crying--probably because an angel had visited her. I was really touched and I imagine that she was too.

My point is, sometimes when I can't figure out what the world is coming to, God shows me.
Have a great week.
Bethanne

Hypercrap

2010-01-25T14:02:00.002-06:00

BG: 79
[CGM]: Above 400 -- shouldn't this thing fix itself??? *scratching head* maybe I broke it with my quick rise this morning to 220. That seemed to push it over the edge and now I can't calibrate it until it's compatible.

My husband is still wondering if this CGM thing is worth it. I still think so. We're adjusting. *shrug*

I'm keeping my 15 minutes of exercise a day up. Yay! It's probably not enough to take any of my unwanted weight off, but it feels good, and really all I have the motivation for at this point. Winter is sure getting to me this year. :P Even the kids are starting to wish for warmer weather. Yucky weather or not, we're all looking forward to a nice trip to Michigan soon. We'll visit friends and family. Just being out of the house will help. Pray for safe travels--and GOOD WEATHER!

I'm on the verge of getting more involved in the diabetes community. It's taken me 22 years to figure out how wonderful the support can be. I never had it as a kid, and didn't know the extent of it until now... weird huh? It is weird. I wish things had been different. Realistically, with a move coming up, I can't commit to too much... Still, I feel it's a good idea. So, tell me. Do you belong to the Diabetes Association near you? Do you find stuff to do with your local JDRF? What is your favorite aspect of being part of your local diabetes community?

THANKS for sharing.
Bethanne

Request!

2010-01-21T21:12:00.002-06:00

BG: 115

So, this is totally off diabetes topic, but I can't help but share with my few blogger friends on Living with It. I got a request from an agent for my completed manuscript, Shake the Sugar Tree. :D I'm so nervous and excited at the same time.

It feels good to have worked so hard on something for so long and to finally have someone read my blurb and think, "huh, that could be interesting." Eeeek! I know, I know. Calm down, lady. it's just a partial request. She wants to see 30 pages. BUT OMGosh! She wants to see 30 PAGES of words that I WROTE!

I just got a little teary there again... *sniff*
thanks for coming here and sharing with me.
Love,
Bethanne

Education

2010-01-19T08:42:00.002-06:00

BG [CGM]: 79

I've started my task of finding an educator for my kids. Actually, I restarted my task... I did try last fall and didn't succeed. All of a sudden, Matt is getting ready and has a tentative date for Basic Training [if he passes all the interview requirements]. It's becoming a reality before my very eyes. :D And that means getting to the nitty-gritty. First and foremost--EDUCATE THE KIDS.

After that... I don't know. Pray. Lots of prayer and preparation. I guess I'm getting a little nervous. Not for me! I think my diabetes will be closer to the bottom...okay middle, of the concern list. My pump and CGMS has really helped me even out and feel more confident.

The changes will be intense, but I think the adventure of starting something new is also exciting. You know me! Itchy feet! I've already lived in seven different states, four of those after I was married. The hardest part of the new venture will be the separation. Let's not ignore the elephant, right? Matt is a buffer in this house. He's the peacemaker [except for when we're fighting. ;-) haha] and most times, the fun instigator.

I think when people hear me say, "This will be exciting," they must think I don't really understand what's to come. But I don't agree. I have an imagination that rivals any great author's, one that helps me see the worst. Fortunately, Matt and I aren't willing to cowtow to the fear.

Ignorance isn't bliss, that's fake.
Knowing the risk, trusting God and jumping anyway... phew. That's the thrill of life.

Jumping Jacks

2010-01-13T08:27:00.002-06:00

BG[CGM]: 194 (and rising!!!) Over a teaspoon of brownsugar in my oatmeal?!?!?! ARGH. ...okay, fine. Whatever. No brownsugar in my oatmeal from now on. :P

I can't do 2 minutes of jumping jacks.
It sounds crazy to me. If you had asked me before I started on this Wii Fitness craze, I would have said "Yes, I can." I'm active and 2 minutes seems short.

It's NOT!!

Holy mackeral. The Wii wanted me to record my resting pulse then my pulse after exercising. Yikes. After a minute I ended up waving my arms while I ran in place. By the time I was finished, I was breathing so hard and loud, I couldn't hear to feel my pulse.... yes, I said that. Why does it need to be quiet to FEEL your pulse? :D

Here's to improvement! Cheers!

A day to myself

2010-01-10T19:12:00.002-06:00

BG[CGM]: 108

Tomorrow is Monday and my hubby is off for St. Louis with the youngest, which means I'm home alone!! Until mid afternoon, I'll have the house to myself. :D :D :D

Time to exercise, to straighten, to read, to write! Write! Yay! A good six hours.... *sigh*

Are you a diabetic? Do you get time alone? Does your family worry with each occasion? So...what do we do to safeguard?

1) eat at regular intervals!
2) check often!
3) stay in contact with friends and family.

I'm looking forward to a day filled with peace and contemplation. ;-)
We all deserve it--diabetic or not.
Take care!
Bethanne

Lots of Snow

2010-01-08T21:31:00.002-06:00

BG[CGM]: 62, will partake a small snack.

It's not that I can't believe the snow. I mean, it's winter and I live in the midwest. I expect snow. Unfortunately, this is the first winter on record [mine, like the permanent one from elementary school] I have ever wished to live somewhere warmer. By some freak shift in my personality, I was not looking forward to the cold, the snow, winter at its best.

What I'm saying is, you have me to blame for this frigid spell because me and Murphy? We're like this . Buds, compadres, amigos... :D

Diabetes is looking good. I've had a few bumps with my sensor. Nothing too trying, just a technical foul--so to speak. The rep and I are going to figure it out... is it the pump? the transmitter? or the sensor? Only time will tell.
Stay safe on those roads!
Take care,
Bethanne

A Sugar Addict's Blog

2010-01-04T00:01:00.000-06:00

My sister found this and I thought it was GREAT Vlogging for diabetics and [obviously] NONdiabetics, too.

Happy New Year!

2010-01-01T20:56:00.002-06:00

BG: 201
CGM: 189

The first day of the rest of my life:
Went to church.
Ate a little too much[overall].
Made an apple pie.
Did NOT eat the ice cream.
Cooked my first venison roast of the year[and last year, too].
Played with the kids.
Changed my infusion site.
Tested my glucose about 5 times.
Entered a writing contest.
Worked on a manuscript.
Bed early!!!

Goal:
Lose 30 pounds this year.

Blood Work

2009-12-31T12:54:00.002-06:00

BG: 176
CGM: 109 -- I'm on the tale end of needing to calibrate, plus I'm trending. Two things that DEFINITELY effect the sensor readings.

NoW! On to more exciting things.

Cholesterol: 180
Triglyceride: 46
LDL: 92
HDL: 78.5

Glucose: 67
BUN: 16
Creatinine: 0.8
Sodium: 140
Potassium: 4.3
Calcium: 9.1
Alk Phos: 58
SGOT (AST): 15
SGPT (ALT): 14

A1C: 5.8 !!!!!!!!!

The perfect end to 2009.

2009-12-29T15:48:00.002-06:00

BG[CGM]: 147 (and rising) "Remind me not to eat those gingerbread cookies anymore," I said to my hubby, Matt as he walked by. :P

FROM dLife Newsletter heading:
Yes! To Cookies
These sugar free (and gluten free) treats come in Strawberry-Banana Blitz and Cocoa-Liscious. This week, save $1.00. Just $9.99 for a package of 10. Go shopping now...

I know! 11 bucks for 10 cookies?!?!?! Seriously, people. This is why I don't buy sugar free. I suppose I could get used to the difference in taste. I do drink diet Coke without a problem. But the price difference is just ungodly! Sheesh. It's almost like a punishment. So, eat well. Eat healthy. And do it without those COOKIES!

Sugar

2009-12-28T11:51:00.003-06:00

If you missed my Diabetes Police blog with Mike, you'll have to go back and take a look. It's very funny.

Yesterday, my houseguest wanted to make a lemon pie with the HUGE lemon she grew in her back yard this year. But the recipe called for one and a half cups of sugar. She said, that's too much sugar for you.

Reply One: A cup and a half in ONE SERVING?! Yikes. That is too much.
Reply Two: Everyone else would LOVE a lemon pie.
Reply Three: I could have a small little peice and bolus extra. No biggie.
Reply Four: How about some lemonade with Splenda?

Anyway, we all deal with it...
My CGMS is working really well after the rough start.
Have a great week.
Bethanne

Christmas Day

2009-12-25T15:27:00.002-06:00

We had such an outpouring of LOVE and GENEROSITY for our Christmas holiday. Family and friends helped out, and even with Matt being STILL out of work, our children enjoyed one of the best Christmas' EVER. [<--that's what my daughter says.]

Blessings to everyone who visits this blog.
~Bethanne

Frustrating Day

2009-12-24T19:56:00.002-06:00

BG: 171
CGM: NOT READING!

Well, that probably shows how I'm feeling today in general. This evening, after a day of weak signals, cal errors, starts and inaccuracy.... I tore that sensor out. First of all, I did NOT have this kind of trouble on my trial with the Minimed CGMS. I'm hoping it was a fluke. I wanted to be hooked up, but I think I'm going to wait before I insert another sensor. [I say that now, but you know how impatient I am!]

I'm reading the manuals and trying to figure out what the heck the problem is... the sensor got 'caught' going in. Meaning, I had to give it a good shove, so I'm guessing it could have been a badly placed sensor. On the other hand, the manual says for the sensor to be in the abdomen, but not in a fatty area... uh, helloo??? Have you met a middle-aged diabetic mother of four? *pulling hair*

Anyway, the day was a little stressful over all, but not too bad. Today--day four with company--was the day I went from pleasantly occupied and companioned to I-need-some-space, please! Ha! Tomorrow will be a better day.

Just a few more things to wrap and Santa's on!
Have a VERRY MERRY CHRISTMAS!
Love,
Bethanne

Just in Time

2009-12-22T10:53:00.002-06:00

BG: 201 on fasting then 53 two hours later...seriously, will need to check my sensitivity levels. 94, now that it's 11:40am and I'm finally finishing this post.

Yesterday, I woke up mindless. I don't know how else to describe it because I don't remember ANYTHING that happened from after I got up with Sean at 5:30, put him in the living room with a snack and went back to bed, until I came back into my mind sitting at the table in the kitchen. Matt had dragged out of bed--just about kicking and screaming, because apparently when I'm out of my mind, I'm a biligerent you-know-what--compliant once he gets me where he wants me, at least this time. *eyeroll* There were times in the past he'd fight me the entire way. Though I grunted a few times that I wouldn't drink OJ, once he gave me the cup, I drank. Thank goodness! God! What a mess that is. I need a glucagon pen. Will have to ask the doctor about that next time I see him.

So, anyway I ate about 3 inches of a turkey Subway sandwich and a glass of milk before bed last night. 201 this morning. Hey, that's better than whatever it was before my hubby checked it and found the 40. Screwy day, but guess what? I'm having my CGMS from Minimed delivered today. Just in time for the new year. I was on the fence about it, but after yesterday--and the lows I've been having in the morning pretty regularly, I decided it would be worth it to give the system another shot.

*fingerscrossed*

Hypo Insensitivity

2009-12-18T15:15:00.003-06:00

BG: 67

It was just a post ago that I was running around like a chicken with my head cut off. But things are settling down. I have a few items left for purchase and maybe a trip to the Post Office. Yay! I always complain, but really once the job is complete, there isn't much to gripe about.

The Christmas candy is starting to trickle in. Class parties, holiday gifts... oh yes. Here it all comes. I'm staying strong! So far. LOL

I look forward to getting my blood test results back from the doctor's office. It's been an exciting fall, testing the CGMS, watching my diet, exercising. I hope to see the efforts reflected in my numbers. I guess I'll be lucky if I see them before Christmas.

There's been speculation about hypo-insensitivity in corrolation with the CGMS. Well, this morning at 37; no one would have even noticed. I hardly did. It doesn't happen all the time, just occasionally. Doing, and I'll be like, huh? really? That just doesn't seem right. *sigh* Who knows? I'm not on the CGMS, so maybe it's a personal thing.

10 days

2009-12-14T09:39:00.002-06:00

BG: 123

Yup. That's right folks.
TEN DAYS UNTIL CHRISTMAS!

Venison Stew

2009-12-12T12:03:00.002-06:00

BG: 252 *eyeroll*

I'm making my first venison dish for the year. It smells soooo good. I found the recipe online and threw every into the crock pot this morning. With a few minor adjustments because I didn't have any red wine, we're good to go and I'll make dinner rolls later in the afternoon. I LOVE MY CROCK POT!

To a winter of cozy warmth and crocked meals...
CHEERS!
Bethanne

Vlog--Just for Fun!

2009-12-07T10:23:00.002-06:00

BG: 50

Because it's a season of love. Because my love reflects my Faith. Because Luke Bryan has a voice that melts me. :D Haha. Because this song asks questions that we all resemble at some point in our life.

The waiting GAME

2009-12-03T09:41:00.003-06:00

BG: 126 <-- ugh! just applied the blood too soon, Error 3 Retest!

Yes, I'm waiting for Dexcom to process my return. I gave them 2 weeks, then two more and when I contacted them, they said, OH, I guess they will process that return now. Oops. That was a week ago. I'm patiently waiting for the end of this week before I double check my insurance again. No point in wasting anyone's time, eh? Hopefully, though by the end of this week, things will be straight and I'll be able to call Minimed and get their CGMS on its way. I was going to hold off, but I've been really frustrated with my lows, especially in the morning.

I'm looking forward to my A1C this month. Anyone want to place a bet on what it will be? LOL Cold turkey, except to say that it was 6.5 in July. I've been tracking really strictly, and staying in range, 80-110, 50% of the time [according to my snapshot readings]. :D I'm going to throw 6.0 out there, but I wonder if it will be lower because I feel WAY better than I did in July, and I've been exercising on top of all this blood tracking. [sounds like i'm on a hunt]

So, Christmas is right around the corner....
What do you want?
I want a LAPTOP, which I'm not going to get, but a girl can dream, right?
Take care,
Bethanne

Cookies at Christmas

2009-11-30T10:35:00.002-06:00

BG: 70

Doing a cookie swap.
So, the question is, what do I make?

How about Cappuccino Crinkles?
Sounds sooooo good, doesn't it?

There's a part of me that feels guilt not making something sugar free. When I was growing up, my diet was always about what I could get sugar free. Holidays and special occasions consisted of the extra stuff... fake oreos, sugar free gummy bears and candy canes. I'm working my way out of that guilt trip. I don't blame anyone for those conceptions, that's just the way diabetes worked twenty years ago. Now, it's different.

My cookbook is wonderful enough to give me nutritional values, so Carb counting is made easy and my insulin doses are USUALLY accurate. My first doctor EVER, Dr. Whalen, always reminded me to give myself a break. Have a cookie on occasion because a rigid mentality would lead to burnout. He was probably right, but I wouldn't know, because I've been giving myself a break for 20 years! Haha. That didn't sound right. anyway, I'm just grateful to him for steering me towards mental health as well as physical health.

Have a great NEW WEEK!
Read something fun.
Bethanne

Diabetes or Fat?

2009-11-29T12:14:00.002-06:00

BG: 114

This morning, my family was fortunate [and blessed] to take part in the annointing of the sick. It was a spur of the moment gesture after Mass that my Hubby thought we could do. Everyone's been under the weather for days and days.

So, I'm sitting there, and my mind drifts to the days when praying for healing seemed like a big deal. [Not saying it isn't, btw] But when I get to the bottom line, I start comparing....

Would you rather be Diabetic or Fat?

Well, Diabetic, thank you very much. I'm not about to make any deals with God over this disease, that's for sure. It can be a pain, but it's not the end of the world. There are worse things in life than Diabetes--like child abuse or cancer or loneliness....

So, I prayed for healing today. Prayed that God would clear my sinuses, clear my kids' sinuses, and get my hubby a job [that's a kind of healing too, if you ask me :D].

I'd love to know, what would you trade for your Diabetes?

2009-11-28T17:01:00.003-06:00

BG: 75

Three days and nothing to worry about.
YAY! That's what I'm thinking on right now as Saturday comes to an end, and I realize, I've had my kids in this house for THREE days with only a few minor disturbances. :D

Not bad, eh? Makes me think Christmas break will be tolerable AND enjoyable!
How did your break end? Are you still with us? Are you laid out, exhausted from the travel and activities?

I'm wishing you peace!
With Love,
Bethanne

Suckage

2009-11-25T19:29:00.002-06:00

BG: 397 <-- who has the power now? WTF

You know that commercial for antique roadshow?
Sometimes you win, sometimes you don't.

Right now, I have no clue.

Health Insurance

2009-11-24T20:06:00.003-06:00

BG: 107

You know I've been sick for a while... well, today I finally feel like I'm back on my feet for good, and tomorrow I will exercise. Yay!

Unfortunately, we are not going to see family for Thanksgiving. It's part okay and part disappointing. You know, after a good 5 days of being down, an 8 hour trip hardly sounds exciting. More than that, though, my brother-in-law is supposed to have surgery in December. It's a surgery he has rescheduled at least twice. Can you imagine if he caught something while we were there?!?!?! We'd never live it down! Not only that, but the've met all the deductibles for the year...and if they have to go next summer, they'll end up paying way more out-of-pocket.

Let me tell you, this is something I completely understand! I do not want my name on anything that may [or may not] hinder this surgery from happening. :D We're all praying for you, John! Maybe we'll see you after Christmas.

So, Matt has scheduled the first ever Annual Wii Tournament!! All day Thursday to battle the best in games like Wii Sport, Wii Ski, Mario Kart, and Lego Star Wars.
May the best Strasser win.
~Bethanne

SICK!

2009-11-22T11:42:00.004-06:00

BG: 130

ICK! Rhino Virus. The common cold. Congestion. Inability to speak.
My suagrs are stable, though. I find that a plus, because in the past, I've always found my sugars high when I was sick.

...maybe my basals really have been that far off for that long. Ugh.

I am taking meds that are not diabetic recommended. Nite Time Cold and Flu. It helps. Thank God, no fevers, just inconvenience. :) AND, I'm starting to feel better.

Travelling to my sister-in-law's this week for Thanksgiving and looking forward to it.
I hope everyone has a blessed holiday full of family and thankgiving.
Today, I'm especially thankful for Sunshine. :D
Take care,
Bethanne

VLOG--Diabetes Police

2009-11-19T17:39:00.001-06:00

I thought I'd share this insightful episode from Mike Lawson:

If I had a million Dollars Game

2009-11-18T12:45:00.001-06:00

BG: 182
Stole this one from my other BLOG.

You remember that song by Bare Naked Ladies? If I had a million dollars I'd buy you a monkey? Well somehow it got stuck in my head the other day and hasn't gone away. And it's left me wondering what five things I would want if I had a million dollars. OK, more like a say, ten million (accounting for inflation since that song came out), but for reasons of cleverness in this blog post title, if I had a million dollars I would ...

Have a library like this ...

In a house like this ... [yes, there's a housekeeper]

And drive this car ...

Vacation here ...

With style like this ...

Now it's your turn. Pick five things you would have/do if you had unlimited funds. Trust me, I know we'd all do something good with that money (I'd set up funds for couples wishing to adopt), but this is a purely selfish post. So be selfish and on your blog, post five pictures of what you would do with a million dollars. Be sure to put a link to your blog in the comments so I can see what you all would really want!

End of Day Report

2009-11-16T19:32:00.003-06:00

BG: 63

Reaching the end of my day with a scowl, I thought to myself, "Are you going to let CRAP win?"

So, I put my sweats on and did my morning exercises. 30 minutes of high intensity aerobics with Ellen on Crunch, Burn and Firm: Pilates.

I made Donuts

2009-11-16T11:06:00.002-06:00

BG: 147

Yes, I did. And they are gooooood. So I gave about half of them away. What can a diabetic girl do? Right? Still, my family enjoyed them...and I find my time in the kitchen soothing, which I really need a lot of right now.

And praying helps. Remembering all the things I'm thankful for, how I'm blessed. Offering my crazy rantings up to God would be a good thing to do BEFORE I go off on my hubby... LOL

I skipped exercise this morning. WHY?! I wish I hadn't. Tomorrow will be a new day. Tomorrow, I'll exercise. Mall walking, anyone? :D

World Diabetes Day

2009-11-14T08:40:00.001-06:00

It's a day to celebrate all the blessings...

Can't Stop

2009-11-13T17:38:00.002-06:00

BG: 155

Every afternoon, I start eating...and I can't seem to stop. A little snack here, and little snack there. Here a snack, there a snack, everywhere a snack, snack. Consequently, my sugars before dinner have been up near 200 for about 3 days. I even increased my basal a hair yesterday to try to curb that curve. Didn't work.

Maybe it's the exercise. I'm finishing up my first week of exercising regularly. It's possible I just need to be more careful.

Mindful snacking is okay...it's the mindless kind that keeps biting me in the butt!!!

...could be that time of the month. :P
Have a great weekend, everyone.
~Bethanne

End of Day Report

2009-11-11T21:21:00.003-06:00

BG: 158

I had a pleasant memory today. A good one, from before Diabetes. I've thought of it off and on throughout the years and a friend's post about candy on Facebook today resurrected it.

When I was a kid, three little girls could walk... at least 6 blocks to 7-Eleven. Gosh, it might have even been more like ten or fifteen! [The world was definitely bigger then.] We had our stash of cash, and came back to Mary's house with good gobs of candy. I remember the Runts especially. I don't know why. After sorting it all, and rationing it, we took off to do something else.

Whatever we were doing in those days...a quick trip to Richmond Park, a run through the sprinkler, a walk around the block to me and my sister's house. On our return, we found Mary's brother eating our CANDY!

The memory sets a glaring light on how different my world is today. Forget Diabetes, how different the world is for my children. Where is the freedom of childhood for my children? It doesn't exist like it did before. Do I move to a smaller town? Do I search for the past?

My memories of life on the West side are so dear to me. Friends from those days are still my friends today and will be my friends tomorrow, too. When I write my stories, I pull from those memories. I pull from the emotions those memories evoke, because they are heartfelt and reminiscent of innocence. Deep down, I think the memories are why my stories so often feature reunions, old friendships and lost love. [No, I'm not pining over lost love. :P]

So, tell me. What is your favorite childhood memory?
...and have a great week!
~Bethanne

Secret Feelings

2009-11-09T20:39:00.002-06:00

BG: 114

I'm really okay with my diabetes. It can be pain, but overall...there are worse things. Like Diane, a mother from my kids' school who sings in the choir at church on Sunday and was diagnosed with breast cancer.

I complain about insurance, how inconvenient, how seemingly inefficient it is, yet I recieved 800 test strips last week and only paid $71. I might have paid $51, but wanted to get them overnighted. That's... Wow. I ordered the CGMS and paid just under $200. When I get down or discouraged about how much my premiums are, I only have to do the math to realize, I'm making out.

I got an email this evening that put me on RED alert. Selfish, unkind thoughts running rampant through my mind at the thought that my brother-in-law bought a house [and it's awesome! says he]. I'm really happy for him... and really surprised by the jealous, discontented feelings that sprung up in my heart over such good news. :(

What's your secret feeling? Is there someone you love, who you've never told? Do you dream of things that might never be? A dislike that brings you to your knees?

Some days, I feel that there is so much inside me...with nowhere to put it. It's like carrying that skeleton instead of stuffing it in the closet. *sigh*

How morose!!! [to be uplifted visit Kerri Sparling]
Better days on the morrow.
Take care,
Bethanne

Going Out

2009-11-06T17:54:00.002-06:00

BG: 140 [thank God (and my insulin)! down after a hyper afternoon]

Messed up my afternoon with a high. Not sure exactly how it happened, but when I checked it found it 301, corrected [more on that in a minute] and checked again in an hour, it was still 269. I feel I know myself pretty well. I keep my sensitivity at 4hours knowing that I probably peak at about 2-2.5 hours because usually when I correct, I'm down by at least half in an hour. So, I changed my site, just in case and corrected again.

I did some unaccounted for snacking. I'm pretty sure. An oversight that bit my ....butt later. So, when my correction units said .8, I doubled. My pump keeps track of how much insulin is active--and though some people say, bleh--I really like this feature.

Anyway, I'm off to Dougherty's Pub and Pins for dinner with some girlfriends. A much needed night out. Cheers!
Bethanne

End of Day Report

2009-11-03T22:01:00.003-06:00

BG: 78 -- drats, I'll have to eat something...but not too much because then my sugar will probably pop right out of the lines. *eyeroll* Maybe with my new overnight basal I shouldn't eat at all. Maybe I can cruise on this... yeah, right. The risk is too high.

See? Now I was going to get on here and talk about something NOT diabetes related!

Like, hey! I read this really fun book over the weekend. Heather Graham's The Death Dealer, a whodunit of classic proportions. Wonderful dialogue, colorful characters and even ghosts thrown in to make it all a little more interesting. Have you ever watched the old black and white movies? Gas Light? Arsenic and Old Lace? That's how reading this felt. It was perfect for the Halloween weekend.

Did I figure it out? Not officially. :D I was never able to pin it down... perhaps my wits have been dulled by too much Max and Ruby and Baby Einstein. Late nights and early mornings...

One other thing, my husband made the most unusual gesture yesterday. He was telling me about his day in the woods. He's hunting for deer this week. He had a chance at a doe, but didn't take it because it had a fawn with it. I looked at him with a question in my eye and he shrugged, "The fawn needs someone to look after it."

I shook my head with a smile. Maybe that's SOP for hunters, but I'd never thought of it before, and to hear that tender sentiment was surprising... and nice.

So I teased him for being a softy.

National Bethanne Month

2009-11-01T16:37:00.004-06:00

That's what I'm calling it because not only is it National Diabetes [Awareness] Month, it's also National Novel Writing Month....

now, I'm not sure what to do about the diabetes month, but for sure, I'll be spending any spare time I have adding words to a new manuscript for this years race to 50k. How to combine the two....

Well, there's always a Glucose testing marathon....
or perhaps a no simple sugar AT ALL challenge. *scratching head* Hmm...
A get-your-own-CGMS goal. I like that one.

I guess, the thing of it is... diabetes is more than writing the next novel. I can put my writing aside when I get tired or discouraged. I can pick up a favorite book to read in hopes of inspiration. Getting out with friends and family helps me revitalize the muses.

So, maybe it's not just my month. Maybe it's everyone else's month, too. Time to help others become aware of the disease that effects so many people from birth to middle age to death. So, I think, once a week, I will recognize another person on my blog who has diabetes like me.

Halloweenie

2009-10-31T21:49:00.003-05:00

BG: 64

I feel like such a WEENIE!!!!

I mean really. One day with an obnoxious amount of candy around, and already I'm seeing a couple of spikes... and feeling unnecessarily junk food hung over. You know what I mean... you don't even have to be diabetic to know what a junk food hang over feels like. Heck, you don't even have to be hyperglycemic.

It's that feeling of needing to brush your teeth...
of wanting to put your head down on the desk and take a nap...
of having a strange desire/desperation to eat meat or a salad.

Well, maybe that's just me. But I don't eat crap well.
I'm not saying I don't like it...
If I didn't like it, I wouldn't have a junk food hangover!!!

I've got to figure something out.
The dietary journal is a decent start. Going to the doctor for an appointment on Tuesday is good motivation to NOT have Reeses, Hersheys, Twizzlers, and KitKats written down between every meal. Still, I need something more.

Oh! Maybe if I got on the scale at every meal, that would also be a good reminder to avoid the kid's candy. *sigh* I'll get there. I am determined. Wonder if I could start exercising up at the mall this week.

Time to call in my girlfriends.
Happy All Saint's Eve, friends!

Hypos

2009-10-29T14:35:00.002-05:00

BG: 59
I think I was LOW almost all night long.
Waking at 3ish, didn't help. My screeching alarm woke me, but I turned it off and went back to sleep. :P Grrr.
When my youngest woke up and needed a diaper, I got out of bed and went to change his diaper--or something. In any case, I remember being very confused about the entire situation.

When my husband was helping me get the kids ready for school about an hour and a half later [I'd already juiced up], Seanny had no diaper on. He was wandering around with just his pants on. Yup. Not a good idea. I'm surprised Sean didn't say anything to me. He would. He's the kind of kid who tells me to put his seatbelt on when I'm getting him in the car. [as if I wouldn't!!!]

Anyway, hypoglycemia can suck!

I threw it AWAY!

2009-10-25T13:23:00.003-05:00

BG: 69

First, I have to show you what's in my yard right now. We have these crazy landpeople who have filled our yard with a number of trees--cigar trees, elms, sycamores, maples, curly-leaved willows... They are on the verge of choking each other out [the trees, I mean], BUT right now, it's too pretty to complain. :)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A couple of days ago, I woke up in the night after [another] nightmare. I swear, these crazy dreams keep coming to me. Anyway, I was headachy, crampy... it was awful. I had my CGMS in, the one with the Tylenol warning. So, I just got fed up and pulled the thing, took two Tylenol and went back to bed. This morning--don't ask me how--I woke from a sound sleep on a gasp. Matt rolled over and asked me what was wrong. "Oh no! I threw my transmitter away!" With a pounding heart, I sat for a minute to catch my breath and think. Think, think! Where was I when I took that thing out?

Thank God, after digging through the bathroom garbage, I found it. Seriously, I don't know how I thought of it... it really was Inspired. I'm about to send it back to Dexcom and without the transmitter, I'm sure I would NOT be getting any money back. :P Phew!

Diet LOGGING

2009-10-23T11:33:00.003-05:00

So, I've gotten back into the swing of things, and now I need to start keeping a log of my food intake.

This is going to be TEDIOUS. I've never done this well. Ever. But, I can't go on guessing at this anymore. :) So, I'll start today. But first, I'll buy a really cool notebook and an even cooler, super-duper pen. :D Cuz who doesn't like to buy stationary and stuff to write with??!?!?!

I have a really cool like here, if anyone is interested in being eligible for a FREE CGMS from Minimed. They are giving 25 away to instant winners the first week in November. Then, at the new year, they are picking 25 more to random winners from a drawing of all who sign up. HERE.

It's something to think and read about, in case you are interested. A CGMS is important for T1s and T2s. I actually had a nurse from my doctor's office question me when I told her I checked my sugar a least 8 times a day. She said, "Ooh, honey. I dont' have any patients who check more than four times a day." Um, I don't care. Maybe if they did, they would be less likely to get complications? I even told her I was Type I, thinking she must be thinking I'm II even with my chart sitting right in front of her. The irritating part was, that they sent my last Rx in to the pharmacy wrong. 4x when I stood at their desk and said, 6-8 times a day!!!! Then, the first gal I talked to called the Rx in and she didn't tell them 30 days, she didn't give any number for refills.... so that's when I called and talked to the second lady. I really like my doctor, but I wonder if I would do better with an endocrinologist who deals specifically with Type I diabetes. :P *sigh*

Here's an even crazier story. When my hubby lost his job, we touched on the idea of Medicaid for the kids and possibly me. Cobra is expensive and we knew it was going to be tight. So, we had our Cobra and applied for Medicaid--resentfully, on my part. I was on Medicaid when I was pregnant with a couple of the kids, and I promised myself we would not do that again. I didn't want to... I didn't like it. Well, a couple of weeks ago, we came to the end of our rope and felt we had to cross over and take advantage of it. But then, walah, Matt did a couple of side jobs and we were able to pay for our BCBS coverage again. It hadn't ended yet, either, THANK GOD! So, when a week and a half ago, I called everyone to tell them we were on a new insurance, This week, I'm calling them all back to tell them we aren't. I think I'm going to pull my hair out. Haha. Still, we're the lucky ones that we can squeak by on our BCBS, but also that we have something to fall back on... Most people don't. Most diabetics who aren't covered can't even get on Medicaid or Medicare. It's disheartening. :( It makes me very sad.

End of Day Report

2009-10-22T20:56:00.003-05:00

BG: 130
BG [CGM]: 129, it's really accurate. If you are a sucker for accuracy, the Dexcom is a GREAT CHOICE. [i found both the MM and Dex equally accurate (and inaccurate, for that matter) over my trial periods, so I'm not rooting for one over the other--they both have + and -]

Long day today. Sort of an emotionally charged [possibly PMS related, but I'm not saying so] day. :P Had a nice long, much needed discussion [okay, it was a fight] with the husband. It really does clear the air, you know? I always hate it at the time, but without it, we'd be boring... and stagnant... never changing... ew.

Sugars were good, but I think I'll be regulating my basals here soon. Lots of lows after dinner and through the night. Will be good to change that basal...and my dinner bolus, too--possibly.

One good thing today, Matt [and I] scrounged a few more [hundred] dollars up to pay for a couple more months of the health insurance. woohoo... [tiny little sarcasm] It is a good thing. Will be even better when Matt has a full time job. :D Yay God! Get Matt a job that he can enjoy and love. [i don't care if it's a lot to ask...]

Exercise

2009-10-21T12:54:00.005-05:00

BG [CGM]: 94

My new bike. Got it for my birthday and have ridden it a few times. Can't help but like it. It's a cruiser--and maybe that's not cool, but I don't care! It has a basket, great for carrying my snacks, water bottles, Dexcom reciever, keys, glucose monitor... you get the idea. I have a lot of baggage.

Today, my first BIG ride. I thought I was going to die! I might live in the middle of a corn field, but we do have a few significant hills through our parks. I had to walk my bike up the last one. But it felt good. I'll feel it more tomorrow, I'm sure. My ride started out a little on the high side, 168. I'd forgotten my glucometer, grrrr. Thank goodness for the CGMS. Without it, I would have gone home.

I had my reciever hooked to my basket........over my first big bump, I watched a few hundred dollars fly up off the basket. My heart stopped. I could just see the thing bouncing from the basket or my bike handle and catapulting into the woods. THANKFULLY, it jumped from my handle bars BACK into the basket. Sheesh. I left it there. It's neat clipped on the rim, but apparently NOT practical! Phew.

I snacked on a breakfast bar [19g carbs] on the way home (I'd forgotten a water bottle, too). When I got home, I was at 89... as you can see in the picture. :D

If you are looking really closely, you'll see the high in the graph from before I went on the bike ride, then it sloped down. Very cool technology. I wish I was comfortable with it, completely! Still on the fence, though I did go back to keeping it since my last post. *eyeroll*

The Unexpected

2009-10-19T16:39:00.002-05:00

Part of being a diabetic is expecting the unexpected. Even upon finding the perfect basal rate with the optimal bolus amount, things can still go awry. Highs, lows... they happen even when I think it shouldn't! I guess that's why I carry sugar and my meter and a card with my name and diagnosis on it. Not to mention the sweetners and gum. Man! Those highs can really make you want something to chew on. :D

Speaking of unexpected, Matt decided he wanted to join the military a couple of months ago. His options are limited in that he has overcome the age limit for both the Marines and Air Force. But, he comes from a Navy family, and wouldn't mind doing the Army either. All that aside, he hasn't closed any doors. He has resumes out with public accounting firms, corporations.... and this week, he applied for a finance position with our local Harley Davidson dealer.

Sooo, when I was online at Medtronic today, I thought, 'what the hell. Let's see what's going on over at the career page.' They are also looking for a tax accountant. So, now he's got an opportunity there, as well....

...and I'm thinking of all the stuff I could get in on from the get-go!!! LOL *sigh* It's a long shot [meaning, that he would take another corporate job], but hey, you never know. An unexpected opening to something new.

What do you eat in Autumn?

2009-10-16T09:57:00.003-05:00

BG: 69

Every season brings its own trials and delights for a diabetic.

Food. How do we deal with it. How do we manage it? How do we celebrate it?
I love fall for its food... Chili, stewes, apples, hot cocoa, cider, breads. The list goes on. Is it a matter of self control? Will power?

Well, yeah. Our tug of war with the disease is just that, isn't it? But I don't think food should limit our joy.

Perhaps you're thinking, that's easy for you to say. You can just pump some insulin and eat whatever you want. Well, maybe that's true to a certain extent. I am blessed to be T1. I have the flexibility of counting carbs. I don't have insulin resistance and I don't need pills.

But, my weakness still lies in food. Weight gain and simple sugars can not be succumbed by insulin alone. So... how can we enjoy the celebration of the season without ruining our therapeutic efforts?

The good: eat the foods you can harvest. Fruits, vegetables... high fiber foods that are delicious. Foods that take some time to prepare, squashes, carrots, potatoes, etc but are mostly overlooked.

The bad: allow yourself an indulgence every once in a while. Take a little extra insulin or a longer walk. Don't cut out all your favorites or you will burnout from this disease.

The obvious: sugar substitutes. They aren't a replacement for carbs, but I do find that they curb the spike when I want something like pie or cake. I realize that lots of people nay the substitutes...it's a chemical. I get that, but the trade off seems much worse: coffee, plain!

Three ways to help you make it, one day at a time, right? That's all we have to do...

End of Day Report

2009-10-13T23:14:00.004-05:00

BG: 168
BG[CGM]: 198

So it has come down to this...
2 weeks with the Dexcom, and I'm about to send it back.

Why, you ask?

Well, I'll tell you. It has to do with efficiency. It's not that I've been dissatisfied with the product. No. The product has done everything it claimed to do. There are features it doesn't have that I wish it did, but even those small things are not why I'm returning it.

It's data management. When I thought it wouldn't matter to have two sets of data, to have two sets of CDEs and RDs working on my behalf, I was wrong. I have some serious maintenance to do on my PUMP settings...basal rates, bolus options, etc. I really want someone who KNOWS my pump to be my primary consultant along with my doctor. And for me, that means giving up the Dexcom and [eventually] going with the Minimed.

This has definitely been a learning experience for me. I'm one of the lucky ones who has been privileged to trial both CGMSs--Dexcom and Minimed. I found they both had pluses and minuses. Where one had a nicer transmitter, the other had better software. For me, accuracy wasn't an issue with either of the devices. Unlike some users, they were equal in that. Off more with the highs than the lows, and when I didn't calibrate.

I found that I tend to feel guilty when I have to make a choice... but that first and foremost, both companies are on my side. They want me to have their product, yes but they are people wanting to make life better for diabetics first. I think, in the long run, how can a company [or its representatives] fault me for my choice? This is a business with a mission to the diabetes community... and if I get to live 10 or 20 years longer because I had a CGMS, who the heck cares who made it?

:D Okay, yes, that definitely sounds like the bipartisan consumer. Haha.
I just want peace for all. ;-)
have a great week.
Bethanne

End of Day Report

2009-10-10T18:52:00.003-05:00

BG: 113

I hate days where I'm eating small bits all day long. I had a day like that today. I know it's supposed to boost the metabolism, but I don't think that counts when at 4:30pm you eat a peice of Papa Murphy's pizza 34 carbs and dual, and at 5:30pm you TEST the potato soup for 33 carbs, and 6ish, you decide you want a small bowl for 27 carbs, and you top it all off with a glass of wine for 18 carbs... seriously. That's NOT what they mean!! LOL Still, we didn't do a sit down dinner, so I just kept popping things into my mouth.

I'm done now, though.

....4 1/2 hours later....
had some wine and sat outside around the fire. Prominent lows through the evening. CGMS was beeping at me off and on. Tried to hide it, but finally got caught when my neighbor said, "Are you beeping?" Haha.
Up now to 86 and still rising.
Feel fine. :)
Happy Sunday!

Dexcom CGMS

2009-10-08T15:55:00.003-05:00

I went a week--as you well know--and I'm uncertain about the CGMS. Partly. I know I have to get used to it. [I'm reiterating, aren't I? Sorry.] Anyway, I'm going to do another week with the Dexcom, then decide if I want to keep it. If I use it the way is recommended...not as a replacement to fingersticking...then it seems pointless to have the second device. See, I ended up turning most of the alerts off of the Dexcom. I was able to relax when I wasn't watching the numbers, which is the key, I think. So, if I'm just trending, then I don't see the point of having two sources of data. *sigh* I really thought the separate data wasn't going to matter. I'm just not sure any more. Another week to get in a groove, then I'll see. :)

Fall is here! I'm so loving the weather. It's cool. A little wet. Colorful. It's beautiful. Despite the diabetes see-sawing, I'm very happy!
Thanks for stopping in.
I hope you enjoy the fall as much as I do.
With Love,
Bethanne

Diabetes Forums

2009-10-08T10:53:00.003-05:00

I got a funny feeling last night.
After days of not visiting a diabetes forum, I tried to get in and couldn't. The message notified me that I did not have access to this page, which I thought was strange. I'm not an obssessive frequenter there, but I like to go in occasionally, see how people are doing, hear what's new, ask a question.

I'll go back at least a few days....
I was there and popped into a discussion where someone was bashing Minimed for their lousy product. Apparently, he had trouble with the canula on his infusion set. This is bad. This is very bad for a diabetic. He fell asleep and went into ketoacidosis, and of course, he mentioned the thousands of dollars he had to pay for a hospital bill, etc. It's a sad, almost tragic story. And sure, MM is to blame for that malfunction. But he called it "bad form"... and I'm sorry, I just don't see that. It's tiring, hearing sob stories... do something about it, do something about the issue then [reasonably] understand that bashing a company probably is BAD FORM. This guy is more than welcome to NOT use Minimed. I can understand how he would be uncomfortable using the product. It takes trust...

But I want to hear the rest of the story. Did he contact the company? He should have gotten his money back. Did they call him an idiot and say screw you? [I doubt it.] Right now, he's just a ranting, disgruntled guy on a smear campaign.

I mean, if you go to bed and your sugar's really high already, why not bolus a correction and wait an hour? Check again... if your sugar hasn't lowered in an hour or two, you might want to change your site, change your stuff. This exact thing happened to me once and I spent an entire day fighting to get low, not knowing that a large part of the insulin being delivered was not making it under my skin. When I found the tubing was broken off at the reservior top, I remember thinking back to an instance when the pump had gotten caught on something. I mean, it's just tubing. It doesn't have superpowers. It's not titanium... YOU are still responsible for your management.

I offended someone on the boards... I think. That was not my intention.

Some forums are full of angry, know-it-all type of people... some forums, it's hard to get a word in edge wise. Sometimes, it just feels like high school all over again. I do have a problem with having an account/profile in there. I would like to be able to close it....

What can I do now, though? Nothing. And that's okay, too. My conscience is clear... if that matters. I guess it doesn't, especially not to whomever it was I upset. For that, I am sorry. I feel it's better to know and be confronted. UGH. It feels crappy to be in this position.

Doing what you don't want to

2009-10-05T17:08:00.004-05:00

Do you ever feel like you just want to throw your hands up and say, NO!

Although this sounds like an opening to a discussion about Diabetes, it's not. Haha. I'm supposed to make all these phone calls to people in my parish, inviting them to come to the Parish Mission next week. But I don't wanna!

This morning, I got up and really wanted to ride my bike. Rock Springs has this great trail running through it, with that in mind, I packed a bag and tossed my bike into the back of Matt's truck. [I think I bent the kickstand doing that] My sugars had been decent all morning, so I felt good to go. Then the truck didn't start, and remembering that my hubby needed to mess with the battery and possibly the starter, I [sighed first] then opted for just riding around the neighborhood. I pulled my bike from the truck bed and went back inside to let Matt know. Feeling kind of odd, I tested my sugar and it was 49. UGH! How frustrating! I was so mad, I just wanted to cry. But I ate something instead and waited about 15 minutes. I wasn't quite 100, but decide to head out anyway. I get about 3 pedal turns from the driveway and have to stop because the pedal is hitting the kickstand. I go back inside and Matt fixes it. Finally, I'm out on my bike...

And it was a good workout. Not too long, but long enough for these unworked muscles.

...now I just have to decide what to do about these phone calls. Maybe I should pay my kids to do it for me. Why? Why did I agree to this? I don't talk well to the people I do know! I am not the extrovert. *sigh*

Just so you know, I'm having some serious trouble with my CGMS. Not in the physical sense, but the mental. I wish I could report differently. Maybe it's because I've only just recently getting serious about my management. Maybe I need a buffer. I don't know...

Maybe it's just too much change for me at one time: diabetes therapy, cgms, a new job, military life... I'm a little overwhelmed right now. I don't know what to do with this continuous glucose data. I think my next step will be to silent all the alerts on this thing except for the low and high. That's not a bad idea. My biggest beef right now is wishing the cgms was linked to my pump... *sigh* I can be a fickle gal, can't I? :P

Mindset

2009-10-02T15:37:00.002-05:00

BG[CGM]: 250 and trending down, FINALLY! Sheesh. What a day. :P
BG: 215

I'm trying to switch over to the CGMS mindset. It's not easy to rely on that technology 100%, even for the trends. Second guessing and impatience have been the overall feeling so far... BUT, I'm keeping at it. Eventually, I'll come around.

~~~~~~~

And some days we just need to hear something funny...

A Catholic guy goes into the confessional box. He notices a fully
equipped bar with Guinness on tap, plus a dazzling array of the finest Cuban cigars.

Then the priest comes in.

"Father, forgive me, for it's been a very long time since I've been to
confession, but I must first admit that the confessional box is much more
inviting these days."

The priest replies, "Get out. You're on my side."

End of Day Report

2009-09-30T21:08:00.003-05:00

BG[CGM]: 154, and holding steady. :P

Well, I got to a point where I started doubting the CGMS, and so I ended up checking sugars on my meter more than I expected to today. The variances I've experienced since making the video yesterday after first hooking up messed with my head. I understand the blood vs. interstitial fluid argument, yet at the same time, my sugars do not normally spike. They haven't spiked in the 24+ hours I've worn the CGMS. That Frosty-cino I blogged about here did the job, but in general my sugar charts look like rolling hills, some taller than others. So, I'm starting to contemplate my goals with the CGMS. If its purpose is to mark trends, than maybe wearing it 24 hours isn't necessary.

On the other hand, when Matt joins the military later this year, I want to believe that the CGMS can offer me a measure of security when I'm alone with my kids. Can it? Should I expect it? I believe the answer is yes. I also believe that overall, the competing companies have comparable products. Little differences here and there, conveniences, pros and cons. That competition will continue to instigate improvement. I think right now, the cons of both the Dexcom and the Minimed are enough that you could chose one over the other and not really be better off, one way or the other. That's just me. I'm pretty laid back. I like the infusion and transmitter device better on the Dexcom. That's why I went with it. That to me--at this point in my life--was more important than having the transmitter linked to my pump instead of another device. For someone on the go ALOT, they might feel differently. I'm not. Yes, I have four children, but really... I'm a writer, so I sit here. If I'm away from my desk I'm in my kitchen, which is a few feet away or i'm in the car with my purse. Not a big deal to me.

I'm justifying for myself. I know that my choice is my choice...but, of course--and Matt thinks I'M COMPLETELY NUTTY--I feel bad having to choose one over the other. That's me. The feel-bad-girl. I need to be okay with the decision, and I am. :) thanks for listening to me drone on and on again.

CGM tracking me down to 129, but it's been at least 45 minutes since I started this blog post. I really do love this CGMS technology. It's fabulous! I told the rep, I could just sit here and watch it...

Vlog Crazy

2009-09-29T20:11:00.003-05:00

BG: 126 [according to the CGM, which was slightly off earlier this evening--after dinner 168 when the Sensor picked up a 139. Maybe not huge, but enough to wonder. :)]

Don't worry, I won't go crazy on you with this video thing. BUT! I did a quickie today after I met with the Minimed rep and she hooked me up with the CGMS for a little trial run. Hope you enjoy!